A Guide to Working with a Coach to Define Purpose

For many people, understanding life’s purpose feels like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Life moves fast, and amid daily obligations, career pressures, and social expectations, discovering one’s unique path can be overwhelming. But the process of finding purpose isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity for a fulfilled, meaningful life.

Here’s where working with a skilled coach can make a world of difference. A coach provides guidance, tools, and support to help people not only discover their purpose but also make it actionable.

Defining purpose is about more than achieving goals or finding a dream job. It’s about living with intention, understanding what drives you at the core, and building a life aligned with your deepest values.

In this article, we’ll explore practical steps, advanced strategies, and valuable insights for working with a coach to define purpose. We’ll tackle the common challenges, misconceptions, and even cultural factors that often come into play in this journey.

By the end, you’ll have a clearer understanding of how coaching can empower you to define and live your purpose.

Why This Work Goes Beyond Setting Goals

Most people associate life purpose with career goals or specific achievements. But the purpose goes deeper than that. It’s an overarching framework that provides meaning to all aspects of life, from relationships and health to personal growth and contribution to society. Purpose answers the “why” behind what you do and serves as a guide for making decisions that align with your values.

A qualified coach helps clients cut through superficial goals to reach the essence of their purpose. They don’t give answers but rather guide clients through self-reflection, observation, and constructive questioning. The goal is to uncover core values, beliefs, and motivations that clients may not even be aware of.

For example, imagine someone who wants to advance in their career. A coach might ask questions like, “What do you want to achieve with this promotion?” or “How will this role allow you to grow as a person?” Such questions reveal deeper motivations—such as the desire to create, inspire, or lead—that go beyond a simple job title.

Step 1: Identifying Values and Beliefs

Values and beliefs are the foundation of purpose. Without clarity on what truly matters, it’s impossible to define a purpose that resonates. Coaches use tools and exercises to help clients identify their core values, often through techniques like values sorting or guided visualization exercises.

Values Sorting: Coaches often use a values card sort activity, where clients rank various values based on their importance. For example, they may place values like “family,” “freedom,” or “creativity” in different categories, starting with “most important” to “least important.” This simple yet revealing exercise helps clients clarify which values are essential to them and recognize values that might be influenced by external expectations.

Guided Visualization: Visualization exercises are another effective way for clients to get in touch with their core values. Coaches might ask clients to imagine their “ideal day” or “life 20 years from now.” These sessions encourage clients to identify what a fulfilling, purposeful life looks like without the limitations of current circumstances.

Step 2: Recognizing Limiting Beliefs

Purpose is often hidden under layers of self-doubt, fear, or assumptions built over years. A coach helps to address these limiting beliefs through thought-provoking questions and reframing techniques. Limiting beliefs can be thoughts like “I’m not good enough,” “I don’t deserve happiness,” or “I should follow what others expect of me.” These beliefs create a barrier to discovering a meaningful purpose.

A skilled coach uses NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) techniques, such as the reframing method, to turn these negative thoughts around. Reframing is the practice of shifting the way we view a situation.

For example, if a client believes, “I am not successful unless I earn a high salary,” a coach might ask, “What does success mean to you beyond financial gain?” This kind of shift challenges the client to re-evaluate their beliefs and consider other forms of achievement that align more closely with their true purpose.

Step 3: Aligning Purpose with Actionable Goals

Once clients have clarity on their values and have confronted limiting beliefs, the next step is to create actionable goals. These goals should align with the client’s purpose and values, creating a life path that feels natural and fulfilling. Coaches often use a structured approach, breaking down larger goals into smaller, achievable steps.

SMART Goal Setting: Many coaches use the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) goal framework to help clients turn purpose into achievable steps. For instance, if a client’s purpose involves creating social impact, a SMART goal might be “Volunteer 10 hours a month at a local charity by the end of this year.”

This approach allows clients to experience progress in tangible ways, making their purpose feel more real and achievable.

Step 4: Developing Resilience and Embracing Flexibility

Defining and pursuing purpose isn’t a straightforward journey; it requires resilience and adaptability. Challenges will arise, and sometimes purpose itself may need to be re-evaluated. Coaches prepare clients to face these ups and downs by helping them cultivate resilience and adaptability.

Resilience-Building Techniques: Coaches often introduce resilience practices like mindfulness, journaling, or self-compassion exercises. Mindfulness, for instance, helps clients stay focused and present, allowing them to navigate setbacks without losing sight of their purpose. Journaling can serve as a record of progress, offering insights that deepen one’s sense of purpose over time.

Embracing Flexibility: Life is constantly evolving, and so is one’s sense of purpose. Coaches encourage clients to be open to shifts in their path, knowing that as they grow, their purpose may need to be adapted. They often stress that purpose isn’t static—it’s a dynamic force that grows as the person grows.

Social and Cultural Impact of Finding Purpose

Defining and living one’s purpose doesn’t just benefit the individual—it has broader social and cultural implications. Research shows that people who live with a sense of purpose contribute more positively to society, engage in meaningful work, and tend to have healthier relationships. They’re often more empathetic, resilient, and driven to make a difference in their communities.

A strong sense of purpose also helps people resist societal pressures and avoid the “rat race.” In a world that often equates success with wealth, those with a clearly defined purpose tend to be less affected by materialistic values and more focused on values like compassion, growth, and integrity.

For example, think of the social entrepreneur who pursues a career in sustainable development, driven by a passion for environmental protection. Their purpose motivates them to make meaningful contributions that not only fulfill them but also create lasting change.

They’re not driven solely by profit but by a desire to make a difference, a value that ripples through their work and impacts society.

Practical Tips for Working with a Coach to Define Purpose

Working with a coach to define purpose is a journey that requires commitment, trust, and patience. Here are some advanced tips to maximize the experience:

1. Be Open and Vulnerable: To uncover deep motivations and values, it’s essential to be open about fears, aspirations, and insecurities. The more honest you are, the more effectively a coach can help you reach your purpose.
2. Embrace Discomfort: Defining purpose often means confronting uncomfortable truths. Embrace the discomfort and trust the process.
3. Set Regular Check-Ins: Schedule regular sessions with your coach to review progress, re-evaluate goals, and stay on track.
4. Take Ownership of the Process: Remember that the coach is a guide, not a decision-maker. Take ownership of the journey, knowing that the discoveries you make are your own.
5. Celebrate Small Wins: Every step toward living with purpose is worth celebrating. Small wins provide momentum and motivation to keep going.

Transforming Purpose into Legacy

Defining purpose with the help of a coach is not just about improving personal well-being. It’s about creating a legacy—a lasting impact that resonates beyond individual accomplishments. When people live purposefully, they become role models, leaders, and change-makers in their communities, inspiring others to explore their own paths.

Imagine a life where every choice, every relationship, and every action aligns with a purpose that speaks to your core. This is the bigger picture of defining purpose: it’s about building a life that reflects your true self and leaves a meaningful imprint on the world.

Working with a coach to define purpose offers a structured, supportive path to achieve this—making the journey fulfilling, impactful, and uniquely yours.